I can’t be the only one that feels like their life is that movie, Groundhog Day, right? It feels like I keep doing the same things over and over and over again, with no end in sight. And don’t get me wrong, Nora is amazing and I love her beyond words… But the days feel like they are all running together. Nora is now 13 weeks, which means I’ve been pumping round the clock for 13 weeks. Ugh. I hate my pump, I hate the timer that goes off on my phone every three hours to remind me it’s that time again. I hate washing bottles and pump parts each night. And I know, I shouldn’t complain, I wanted all this, just feels like a lot right now. Eric did get back into town yesterday, but of course he had a ton of work to do, thus he wasn’t much help with Nora. Not that he doesn’t want to help, I know he does, he just has so much to do and so little time. And I thought I was doing so well today, picked out meals for this week and Nora and I picked up all the ingredients. But it’s almost 7:30pm and Eric hasn’t even left work yet. So frustrating. Makes me feel like making dinner is pointless when his schedule is so unpredictable.
I did decide to make a few changes today, to hopefully make my days easier. First, I’m dropping one of my pumps, going for 7 to 6 in each 24 hour period, at 7, 3, and 11. Not sure what this will do to my supply, but I already have more than I need, so I’ll just see what happens. And second, I switched Nora’s fortifier. We left the hospital on Neosure, and then for the past two weeks or so we’d been trying Enfacare, but honestly, she acts uncomfortable on both. She strains to poop, even though her stools are loose. Does that mean her stomach hurts? And while her reflux is better on the Zantac, I hate that she has reflux in the first place, as I blame the fortifiers for that as well. I did a little research online today… Apparently there is a human milk fortifier, well, several actually, I requested some information on this one, we’ll see. I’m not even sure it’s for sale to the public In the meantime though I asked a preemie mom Facebook group what they use… Several told me they just mix Gentlease with breast milk to make it 24k/cals per ounce, even though technically it isn’t a preemie fortifier. I feel a little bad taking it upon myself to switch things up without her doctor’s okay… I’m only going to try it for a few days though, just to see if she acts any different. I don’t want to jeopardise her health, but I also hate to see her so uncomfortable.
In other news, I’m stressing about what to wear Friday evening to Eric’s residency graduation dinner. I purchased two dresses and already asked my Facebook friends for votes. Not a single person voted for the peach… Many didn’t think it was very dressy, but it’s silk, and in person I find it just as dressy as the black. Links are below. I just feel like black is so plain, I always wear black, feels like I should mix things up a bit… I’m not sure if I’m wearing either though, nor do I have shoes picked out. I might try to stop at Von Maur someday this week and see what they have…
Oh, and I’m pasty white. No, seriously bad. I was given Tarte Self Tanner as a gift and used it once a few weeks ago. I liked the results but had only applied it to my legs. Well, this morning I put it everywhere, even my face. I assume I’ll need to apply it again before Friday to truly get a noticeable tan. Oh gosh I hope I didn’t miss any spots! And I couldn’t keep Kona away from me today, I’ll probably have white lick marks on my legs! That’s all I need!