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October 26, 2015 – 32 Weeks (21 Weeks Corrected)

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Nora is so so fun!  It’s so cute to watch her learn and explore.  It’s almost as if I can see her thinking!  Her love this week… still her toes.  Always in her mouth!  Hates socks since it restricts her toe licking!  She is also experimenting more with her ‘voice’, adding in louder yells and screams to her babble.  It’s cute.  I assume it won’t be when she’s angry at 2am!  But for now, adorable!

I’ve been struggling lately with the idea of baptizing Nora.  I think I’ve posted in the past regarding my religion, growing up Catholic, by lately my lack of faith being I feel unwelcome by the Catholic church since my divorce.  Having moved recently to a new city though, I thought maybe this would be a good time to join a new church, thinking maybe they wouldn’t question my past church presence, just assume we were joining since we’re new to the area.  You know, a way to start fresh without having to rehash the past.  So, I contacted the only Catholic church in our new city, and people, I tell you, I feel just as unwelcome yet again.  I was sent this form to complete before we can join…

parish registration form

Um…  How am I supposed to fill all this out and still feel welcome?  Eric isn’t a practicing Catholic.  Since I’m divorced we weren’t even married in a church…  Ugh.  I saw this and basically just figured we would not be joining.  I don’t want to have to explain myself and my past.  And the Catholic church wonders why it’s losing members, young members, at an alarming rate.  I thought God wanted everyone?  Except if you’re divorced.  Or gay.  Or haven’t been to church lately.  Or not married in a church…  Ugh.

So Nora is almost 8 months old and still not baptized.  And I’m struggling.  I want a special celebration of her, but how?  And where?  I looked into possibly baptizing her at the church where I grew up, but they require both parents to attend a class on a specified Monday evening.  So that’s out with Eric’s schedule, and would even be difficult for me, since I assume the children aren’t supposed to be present.  That and it starts at 7pm and is almost 2 hours from our home.

The MOPs group I joined meets each Thursday morning at a beautiful church in Cedar Falls, but it happens to be nondenominational.  Being raised Catholic it’s very odd to me that a church can be of not any denomination.  Then what do they believe?  I assume their website explains such… and perhaps if I’d take the time to explore I’d understand, but I haven’t.  I do know that they don’t baptize until the child is old enough to decide for him/her self that they wish to follow God.  Therefore they offer Child Dedication.  I guess I’m just really confused about what I believe, what this church believes, and what exactly I want to instill in Nora as she grows and learns.  Perhaps a visit with someone at this new church would be a starting point…  I think what will complicate this even more will be Eric’s views, or lack thereof.  I can’t remember now…  Did I explain the baptism compromise I attempted with him, and the fiasco which resulted?  I’ll have to look back at my posts…

12 thoughts on “October 26, 2015 – 32 Weeks (21 Weeks Corrected)

  1. What an interesting dilemma. I shall be interested in how you resolve it.

  2. I hope you decide what you feel is right. I go to a nondenominational church. If you have any questions I’m free to answer.

    1. I might have a few…

  3. Our boys are not baptized because Nic doesn’t go to church and didn’t understand why I wanted to do it. He said if God loves everyone then why do you have to get baptized, shouldn’t he let you into heaven anyways. So we wait. Try a Lutheran church,mc lose to catholic no politics

  4. I would attend the church and see what you think. My church is non-denomination meaning we don’t segregate ourselves into different groups and beliefs; we are Christians who follow what the Bible says. We also do baptism when people are old enough to make a choice. Like I said, check it out and see what you think. My husband was raised Catholic and it took him a while to adjust to a different kind of church, but now he really likes it.

    1. You’re right, we should attend before we make judgements. Just so hard when Catholic everything was drilled into my brain for years and years.

  5. I know where you’re coming from to a point. I grew up catholic as well. My husband grew up reformed christian. We got married in a lutheran church. We still don’t know where we fit in denomination wise. We’ve looked at a few local churches and we both can’t find one we agree on. Mackenzie was baptized in a reformed Christian church that most of my husband’s family goes to.

    1. I need to do some thinking on this, I’ve been avoiding it lately, but I really want to celebrate Nora in a special way…

  6. You might want to check out an ELCA (Evangelical Lutheran Church in America) Lutheran or Episcopal church. Both would feel closer to your catholic experience liturgically and theologically, but are definitely more progressive and open about marriage/divorce/gay stuff. You may still have to look around for a good one. I’m Lutheran and feel very at home in Episcopal churches, as does my raised-Catholic friend who left the church because she’s gay.

  7. My advice is just start trying out some churches! Sure, you may have to go without Eric, but that’s ok. It’s ok for something to be important to you and not to him as long as he respects that. Some churches will have childcare and some Nora will stay with you. The way people treat you and help you will help you decide where you feel most welcome and comfortable. As for us, I was active in the Unitarian Universalist society in Iowa city (just me) and then we joined the Unitarian Universalist congregation of the quad cities together a year after the babies were born and they had a child dedication on their first birthday weekend (when we came out of winter isolation).

    1. I guess part of me is so sick of doing things alone, being it seems like Eric is always working and thus I’m forced to do things alone… But you make a good point. I can’t expect Eric to have all the same interests as me.

      1. Yea this is a hard one because so many people expect couples to have the same faith and attend worship together. But that is not always the case and I have had to learn to accept that.

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