New Normal

Please tell me my new normal won’t be chaos all the time? It’s day one and I already feel like I’m failing. And Eric is still home with me. How do I give Nora the attention she is demanding and still care for Nadia? How do I hold both at the same time? Why does Nora scream at the top of her lungs when she doesn’t get her way? And when will Nora learn ‘gentle’? I swear she’s gonna smash Nadia every time she tries to climb into the swing with her. I only got one hour of sleep last night and I’d love a nap but there are three billion things to do here… what should I be doing, and what can wait? What do other people do the first day home?

I guess breastfeeding is going okay, but we are still using the nipple shield. I’ve been pumping 30+ ounces a day though. How do I go from that to just feeding her? I’ve been trying just to pump inbetween feedings when I feel really full, and only for maybe 5-6 minutes. Anyone have experience with this? I’m feeling like pumping and bottle feeding was easier… Am I causing more of a problem by still pumping? And how do you know when a baby is full? I feel like all she does it fall asleep so I figure she’s finished. And then 10 minutes later she’s crying for more. Ugh. This will get easier, right?

13 thoughts on “New Normal

  1. Hugs, lady. You’ve got a lot going on and I imagine it’s going to take some time for you all to adjust. The only thing I might be able to help with information wise is breast-feeding. Because you have been pumping so much you are definitely producing more right now than Nadia could ever eat. You may want to talk with a lactation consultant about the best plan for trying to cut back your milk production while working to avoid a clogged duct or mastitis. As far as Nadia falling asleep while she eats, June did that for many weeks and I think most babies do. As she gets older she will stay awake longer. We had to tickle June, put a cold cloth on her neck, undress her, etc. to try to keep her awake to eat. It was a struggle at first but once she started staying awake longer it got a lot easier. Good luck, mama. I will be thinking about you.

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  2. Stef this is the new normal. Having baby number two is hard on baby number 1. Nice touch doesn’t come easy and the “strong independent streak” Nora is showing is her learning that there are consequence and she is in charge of her surrounding. Offer her time with Nadia so she doesn’t try climbing in the swing with her. As for breastfeeding. I would pump in the Am to feel empty but then just feed her, don’t pump again until she goes to “bed”. This will reduce e your supply. As for breast feeding. If she peeps, screams, or cries throw a boob at her. She may be a short eater or may eat for longer periods as she gets older. You will learn hunger cues and breastfed babies eat until they are full. They don’t work hard if they are full and don’t just keep eating like bottle fed babies. Message me anytime. Breastfeeding after pumping USB. Completely different ballgame.

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  3. I hate to say it, but going from 1 kid to 2 kids was a bigger adjustment than going from 0 to 1! And yours are closer in age than mine, which will likely make it even harder. It will get easier. In a year or so they’ll be able to play together and you’ll get a brief minute when you realize Nora is entertaining Nadia and you can just sit back and watch them and smile. But for now, its going to be very difficult. The good thing is, they’ll survive and you’ll survive. Just be prepared for a year or two of crazy ;-).


  4. And to answer your other question on the pumping and nursing, I pumped once per day to build a freezer stash while on my 12 week maternity leave. If she is doing well with nursing, I’d leave the pumping to just that. Your body produces milk based on how often you are emptying, so if you are constantly making your body think it needs to produce milk, that’s what it’ll do.

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  5. So many of the questions you ask are things I keep thinking about as #2 will be here in 4 weeks or less. I will be finding out the answers right along with you. I think it will take some time for everyone to adapt but you will all get there. I do hope you’re able to get more than an hour of sleep tonight!


  6. So I’m pretty sure that the first 2 years of young siblings are challenging…but I’ll send chocolate and wine your way! As for the BF, definitely slow down on the pumping. It will be uncomfortable but try to cut back on sessions and only express what is absolutely needed to be comfortable. She will eat as much as she needs. A hungry baby doesn’t just sleep, given they are healthy! That will mean that she might eat every 1.5-2 hours, which does suck a ton, but it’s not worth also doing the work for pumping. And BF is wayyyyyy easier. Less crap to haul around and deal with.
    Good luck, lady! The sleep deprivation will at least get easier…hopefully!


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