Time Flies

I seriously don’t know where the time goes… I haven’t written in weeks! Quick updates, neither house is sold, but Hiawatha house is officially listed with a realtor… So who wants to buy it??? There was an open house yesterday and can you believe some neighbor stopped by and said they wanted help in deciding who their new neighbors would be…

In other news I’ve been sick for days. I thought maybe I had a sinus infection but I seem to be getting better without antibiotics, so maybe just a bad cold. I joined a gym and today is the first day of the new session of Next Level classes. Basically where they work you so hard you die. I’m not sure if I’m completely well enough to workout, but we’ll see. I hate to miss the first day. Isn’t that like missing the first day of school when all the important information is given?

Speaking of ‘school’ or daycare, or whatever you want to call it. The girls are still crying at drop-off. I feel so horrible. The only thing that keeps me taking them there is the fact that they are smiling and having fun when I pick them up each day. This daycare/preschool actually has three large centers spaced throughout our city. Apparently it’s the place to go here. Anyway, I noticed on their Facebook page this morning they are looking for a Finance Director. It sparked my interest, well, because that’s what I know, what I’m qualified to do… I’m actually quite over-qualified for what they are looking for, and they are a non-profit, so I assume the pay is shit, but… I feel like I need more in my life, although I’m not sure a full-time job, doing something similar to my career before I had children, will really make me happy. Maybe it’s part-time… ha! Maybe I’ll apply… and just see what it’s all about…



So much to say, so little time.

In the past week we’ve had 3 showings and an open house at the Cedar Falls home we moved into a week ago. It’s so stressful for me to keep it clean with two littles and a dog. And the more Eric and I think about it, we think maybe we should take it off the market for now. I mean, if it sells before our (much more expensive) Hiawatha house, then we’re forced to buy a second home while still owning the more expensive one. Ugh. What are the chances they both sell at the same time?

The Hiawatha house is still listed for sale by owner, but I’m getting no traffic. I’m waiting for a Realtor to stop by right now, who is somehow my cousin, maybe second cousin. She actually sold us the house. I’m so confused by Realtors though. One emailed me this morning and offered to take less on commission. But then this Realtor said not to take lees commission, as it’s a sign of a bad Realtor. Like going to a discount Urologist. I guess… I don’t know. Isn’t it normal, and smart, to shop around? So yes, I’m here, I’ve been cleaning all day, hiding stuff, as we still have some personal items here, stuff we didn’t need for now. Not a lot of furniture, but lots of kids toys, the guest bed, a curio in the kitchen, and everything in the garage. All the crap that’s hard to pack, and some big stuff, so need to hire movers again.

Sorry, I wasn’t able to finish and post before the Realtor stopped by…

Her and I chatted, but I’m still confused. Do I pick to pay her 7% when the other guy is offering 5%? The difference is a lot of cash when we consider the house is worth over half a million… Both plan to stage the home. What else should I be expecting?

I guess my days the rest of this week, and probably next too, will be spent continuing to pack and move all the stuff still there, while cleaning and deciding who to hire to sell the place.

On a side note, it was a little strange being back there again today. It feels like my house, but yet it doesn’t. We only lived there a year and a half… and we did make a lot of great memories there, but I certainly can’t say I’d gotten attached to the house. It was a house, not really ever made it into the home category. But… looking back, we’ve moved so much during the past five years, four times now, each time buying a house and selling one… I haven’t felt ‘at home’ in any of the houses really, maybe because none felt permanent. Honestly, I’ve felt rather homeless, not really settled. I long to feel settled, to feel cozy in a space I call my home. Hopefully soon.


I don’t have a lot of pregnancy news to share, since it’s still so early.

Toward the middle of last week my waking several times a night to pee ceased, and thus I freaked. I’m telling myself my body is adjusting somewhat to the increased hormones… Feel free to reassure me this is the case!

The bloating has not subsided, and honest to God, I’m going to need maternity clothing soon! I tried the hair-band trick, but most of my dress pants for work don’t have buttons, but rather those stupid hook things, and for the life of me, I can’t figure out how to make those pants work with my bulging gut. (No laughing!) A few friends suggested the belly bands, so I think this weekend I need to invest in several of those. If I consider my weight on CD1 of this IVF cycle as my starting weight for this pregnancy, I’m only up 1.1 lbs., but I feel huge! I will need a larger bra soon, but I won’t complain about that!

I haven’t noticed any nausea yet, nor have I felt any more tired than usual. Part of me wants one or both of these to set in so this pregnancy feels more real, but I’ll be careful what I wish for… I will say I felt off this morning. Not sick to my stomach, but just different. A very strange feeling. Is this how it starts??

I still have some dull aches, almost cramp-like, but not entirely painful, more like twinges, every now and again. I used to stretch every morning before I got out of bed, but I noticed doing such caused sharp, shooting pains in my abdomen. What’s up with that??

My 7 week ultrasound is now only 12 days away, and my last progesterone injection is only 19 days. I picked up more of the 22 gauge, inch and a half needles yesterday, hopefully my last refill of those this pregnancy! I’m used to the shots by now, but they do dictate my schedule a bit. Last Friday night Eric and I went to a movie and had to do my shot early before we left, and then Sunday we were in Cedar Falls house shopping and were forced to do my shot in the car, at a gas station. Classy, I know!

Speaking of house hunting… I haven’t written much lately about our upcoming move to Cedar Falls. Not because it hasn’t been on my mind, but more because baby-making has taken precedence. Eric and I were in Cedar Falls this past Sunday though, and I’m pleased to say, it was a surprisingly productive visit!

If you remember, Eric and I have been working with an extremely pushy realtor since January. Not knowing if we wanted to build or purchase existing we’d asked our realtor to give us options for both. Well, long story short, that particular female realtor showed us several existing homes, one which we really, really liked (I think I shared some pictures of it on here) but she repeatedly told us building wasn’t an option as there were no suitable lots for the home we had in mind to build.

Annoyed with feeling as though we had few options, Eric and I decided to wait on making an offer on the existing house we liked, fearing one should never buy the first thing they see. Well, wouldn’t you know, another couple made an offer on it, and it appears to now be sold.

So what does one do when they need a lot and their realtor swears there aren’t any? Yes, you find a new realtor! Last Sunday our new, younger, male realtor showed us six lots, and offered to make calls on a few others if we wanted more to pick from. Which reminds me, that pushy realtor emailed me again yesterday, even though I’ve asked her several times to stop bothering us!

So the lots… There are two we really liked. One is more sensible… Oh, being sensible really sucks sometimes! The sensible lot is in a new development, this particular lot backs up to a pond, so nothing would be built behind us, which is great. There are already several beautiful homes on the street, with more to come soon. Aside from the pond though, it’s your typical new development, barren of any trees besides those which are brought in after construction. A fence for Kona would be allowed though, which is a huge plus! The not as sensible lot is twice the size, which is really way more land than we need, and twice the price. It’s in an older area of town, owned by a neighbor for years and years. It’s completely wooded. I mean completely. We’d to have clear a portion of the lot to build on. But wow, the scenery would be amazing, a truly unique lot. Of course, since it’s twice the price, and would cost perhaps $30k just to clear space to build, it doesn’t make as much sense to purchase. I assume we’ll forgo making an offer on it, but wow, it would make for an amazing setting.

Sunday evening we also met with a builder. He asked lots of questions regarding our tastes, what we picture for our home, the lot we had in mind, etc. He thinks having the home finished by next August is doable, but would mean we need to start digging the foundation around November 1st. Um, that’s only a month from now. How am I supposed to design my dream house in 30 days??? I’ve been looking on Pinterest, and I love almost everything I see. How does one pick one kitchen, one living room, one lower level bar, one outside sitting area, etc? I’m overwhelmed already. The builder was going to put together our ideas and get back to us in a few days… Hopefully Eric and I can meet with another builder soon so we can compare work and finalize the lot purchase.

Feeling overwhelmed I made a point to talk to Eric last weekend about possibly going part-time at work. I’ve been scared to bring it up to him, as in the past he’s made comments such as, ‘you like to eat, right’, whenever I mentioned cutting my hours. I know he was kidding, but still. I don’t him want to feel like I’m not pulling my weight from a financial standpoint in this family. During our drive to Cedar Falls last Sunday morning I forced the conversation, beginning with how bored I am at work lately since most of my duties have been transitioned to our new team member. To my surprise, Eric was very open to the idea, although curious what was in it for him. I pointed out how much happier I’ll be, less stressed, more time to take care of everything at home, since his time there is so limited… Now though, to convince my boss. I’ve drafted an email to her, but I’m not sure I like the wording, or maybe I’m just too scared to hear it’s not a possibility. Any suggestions on how to approach this conversation differently so it ends in my favor? The draft of my email is below…

Jill, I’ve been meaning to talk to you about a few things, but being you’ve been off enjoying Italy (I’m so jealous!), I thought it might be a good idea to write down my thoughts now and discuss them later when you have more time.

As you know, Eric and I just completed another IVF cycle and it was a success. My due date is June 1st. It’s still very early, and obviously a lot can happen, as I realized last time, but we’re really hoping for a good outcome. My test results look much better this time, leading us to believe the chances of a healthy baby are much more realistic now than with our previous IVF cycle.

That said, I expect more appointments and tests in the weeks and months to come. In fact, my first ultrasound is already scheduled for 8am on October 13th, just two weeks from now, when I’ll only be 7 weeks along.

In other exciting news, Eric and I went house hunting this past weekend in Cedar Falls and actually found a few lots we are considering for building. We had our eye on one particular existing home, but it sold in the past few weeks, so we’ve feeling as though building is now our only option, as surprisingly not much is for sale in that area. We met with one builder so far, but our realtor has advised us to interview at least one more before we finalize plans. And if we want to be able to move by next August when Eric is set to start work, we need to break ground before November, which actually only gives us a month to secure the lot and finalize floor plans. Doesn’t feel like much time!

All that said, I’ve been feeling quite overwhelmed with tasks in my personal life recently… and I’m wondering if me going part-time, even if only temporarily, would be an option. My first concern is still work, and making sure the team is supported. I was reviewing my tasks since Jaclyn’s arrival and I honestly think I could keep the vast majority of them, even if only working part-time. The majority of my tasks aren’t deadline based, and I realize month-end is a priority here, but if Nate is taking over A/R, that large task wouldn’t be affected by my absence. I envision me still being able to complete the expenses and 243 portions of the executive summary too, although since Nate hasn’t trained me yet, I don’t have a perfect grasp on the time involved.

Most of our department meetings are scheduled during the mornings, and I think it’s better I be present here daily, as to stay in the loop with the team, so ideally I was thinking Monday-Friday 8am-noon. But again, I realize this may not even be a possibility. If my hours did turn into just mornings, I’d make every effort to schedule other appointments in the afternoons, but my doctors here don’t always have afternoon openings, so I guess I can’t guarantee I’d never need to use sick or vacation time.

Please let me know your thoughts when you have time to discuss.

Suppression Day 3

First…  I’m feeling like a fairly horrible friend today.  I realized that all I think about is having a baby, but yet I never ask my friends about theirs.  And no, there is no excuse, but can I at least explain my reason?

This is going to sound horrible, but in being honest with myself and this blog, here goes…  I don’t think about your kids.  I mean, I know you have them, but when I think of you, I think of you, not you with them.  Often I see you but not them.  You email me, not them.  You text me, not them.  It’s your life separate from me.  Does that make sense?

So, do I not think of your kids because I don’t have kids?  Because my life revolves around adult things only?  Because I don’t even know what to ask about your kids? I don’t know what it’s like to have kids, to tend to them after work, to think of them rather than myself.  My evenings and weekends revolve around me…  Eric and I have never needed a sitter.  I’ve never said no to a social event because I was tied down at home with children…

So for the record, I want to say I’m sorry for failing to inquire more often about your children.  It’s not that I don’t want to hear about them though, I do.  I just don’t even know what to ask.  I’m rather clueless when it comes to what certain age children do, so please, tell me!  Share the funny and cute stories with me!

Third shot this cycle is complete.  I noticed a few odd feelings today, but no idea if they have anything to do with the medication.  I’ve been trying to drink more water, so of course I run to the bathroom non-stop.  Today seemed different though, even more than my more than usual.  I also noticed that I feel slightly shaky in-between meals, like perhaps my blood sugar is low.  Not common for me, so this is new.  Oh, and awful cramps.  It’s not time for those yet I thought!  Otherwise, just feeling bloated and fat.  I’m seriously thrilled to take my last BCP tomorrow morning.  I’d like to think it will be the last ever in my life.  But I’m not holding my breath!

My UV light for my gel nails arrived today!!!  You know, the gel nails the salons do that last somewhere around two weeks without chipping?  Yeah, well, the supplies and light aren’t really all that expensive.  Plus, a girl at work does her own and hers always look amazing.  So I ordered a kit from Amazon and painted my toes and hands today after work!  They look good, for my first time.  My toes actually look really good, probably because I did one foot at a time.  For my hands I was getting antsy and thus hurried a bit, and it shows.  I got a bit of the polish and such on the skin around my nails, and I have a feeling as they grow that isn’t going to end well.  But, for my first time, they look pretty darn good if I do say so myself!

Tomorrow morning Eric and I are dropping off Kona at playcare for a spa weekend and heading to Cedar Falls to meet with our awesome Realtor again.  I’m excited and not at the same time.  I mean, it is fun to look at houses, and Eric has given me an almost unlimited budget, but all the money in the world isn’t going to make CF exciting in my mind.  I know our Realtor is showing us a couple existing homes, such as this one, but honestly, I think I’d rather build.  I feel like we are just settling on something if we buy existing, as there are honest to God only about three homes for sale in our price-range in CF.  The link above looks really neat inside I think, but the house itself is really old and while remodeled, it makes me wonder if crap will start falling apart as soon as we move in.  I know our Realtor has some recommendations for builders, so I really want to focus on that option tomorrow.  And would it be too much to ask for palm trees to be flown in?  No laughing, I’m serious!