Nanny

I hate to say this, but I think our summer ‘nanny’ is really lazy. I picked her as she impressed me at the interview. She’s a 27 year-old married 2nd grade teacher. Very easy to talk to… which I always look for. I don’t want it to be awkward with someone in your house so many hours a week. And she’s not all bad, the girls do seem to have fun with her, they are happy, but… I don’t know… She is almost always on her phone. And yes, sometimes around my girls I am too, but it’s her job. She is pretty much always late in the morning, even if only 8-10 minutes, but still, it annoys me. She does ‘teach’ them as I asked, but really only from the workbooks I provided, which I easily could have worked with them myself. For the most part they really just watch TV all day. And since the girls come to me for everything, I feel like I have to leave the house, even though I have so many projects at home I want to complete.


I’m still waiting for a few blood test results for Nadia, one being Lyme. I’m so anxious to get more details about everything this new provider wants to treat and how. For the most part Nadia is having good days. Very few epic meltdowns, she is sleeping well, in a generally good mood… but still usually refusing underwear, which is my biggest concern related to her going back to school. And the end of August will be here before we know it. Plus, she is currently home most days, if even just with the nanny. I fear for how she will be when I drop her off at preschool. Although she hasn’t seemed to care when I leave her home lately, so perhaps a plus.

I’ve done a bit more decorating, well, very little, don’t get too excited. And I’m not sure I love any of it, but for now it looks better than the random toys everywhere!

Oh, and apparently Nadia is completely over her sensory issues with her hands feeling icky, as she now loves worms! She is not my child! I don’t want those things anywhere around me. And Eric wants to take the girls fishing this weekend. I hope Nadia isn’t too attached to her worm.

And I dug out my Maker to make one item… I didn’t have permanent vinyl though, so not sure how long it will stick…

Summer Nanny

I finally hired a summer nanny! She is coming over tomorrow for me to show her around, get to know the girls better, discuss the schedule going forward, etc. I’m excited, but really anxious too. I’m always anxious about leaving the girls. She wanted full-time hours, but I don’t need full-time, being I’m home most of the time. I have a lot of projects I want to get done around the house though, so this will be good. I’ll let you know how tomorrow goes!

The provider we saw in Minnesota offered a peer to peer with our MD in Creston, IA. I emailed the MD this morning to see if she had any interest… And I emailed the naturopath too. Nadia has been complaining of stomach aches lately and I can’t figure out which supplement might be the issue, as she is on so many.

I have two more blood test kits at home for Nadia. They involve pricking her finger and dropping blood onto cards we then mail back. Any suggestions on how to do that with a four year-old?? She is really good with the blood draws in the lab, but I’m not sure what she will think about us sticking her finger at home. Oh, and that reminds me, I still didn’t collect her urine to drop back off at the lab.

This afternoon I think the girls and I are going shopping for Father’s Day, which is Sunday already. Should I let them decide what we buy him?? I wonder what they will pick, LOL!

Long Overdue Update

I haven’t written in forever. And now, so much has happened, I’m overwhelmed with how to explain everything you’ve missed on our PANS journey. I guess maybe highlight the big points for now…

School is out. I can’t believe Nora will be in 1st grade come August… Wasn’t she just born??? I did remember to take a few pictures the last day of school, and a few at the park where the school went for the afternoon.

I’ve been interviewing college girls to come watch the girls a few hours a day so I can get my long list of crap accomplished, like organize every room of the house, buy furniture, do laundry… you get the idea. So far I haven’t loved any of my choices. We have one more interview tomorrow. Nora is in dance camp each morning this week… so thankfully no constant fighting at least for a few hours.

We went to Adventureland in Des Moines, IA which is not that far from our home a few weeks ago. I’m surprised the girls liked as many rides as they did, I kind of figured they, well, especially Nora, would be terrified. But they both had a lot of fun!

And then the following week we went up to Minnesota for two reasons… One to hang out at the Great Wolf Lodge water park, and two, to see another PANS specialist who I’d heard wonderful things about. I’ll write a separate post on that visit, soon, I promise.

And here are a few more random pictures of summer so far 🙂

July 10th

Wow, July 10th. I haven’t written in over a month. I have no idea how that is possible. The month of June somehow flew by, but yet each day felt like 17 years.

June was basically the same as May, only hotter. We played in the pool a lot, see some pictures below, as we still aren’t going out in pubic. It’s been somewhere around 119 days in isolation. I keep saying I might lose my mind. Perhaps I already have. Today is especially bad, it’s near 100F so we haven’t been outside much… and they are obviously sick of being stuck inside. They fight. Nadia is quite physical. I feel like I keep pulling her off Nora. No amount of sending her to her room does any good. I suspect a lot of Nadia’s behavior is sensory related, more on that in another post, but regardless, we need to discipline. And I have no idea how, as nothing I have tried works. I know we can’t stay inside forever, but with cases rising again, I’m just not all that comfortable taking the girls out yet.

In other news… WE BOUGHT A HOUSE. Eric keeps teasing me that it’s our annual real estate purchase, as we seem to move every one to two years lately. It’s a really pretty house, I’ll post a few pictures once we are moved in. We close July 27th but the movers don’t come until August 8th. I guess I should be packing.

Nadia had her first occupational therapy (OT) session last week. They gave us a reoccurring appointment, every OTHER Thursday for 30 minutes. I’m annoyed. I don’t feel like it’s nearly enough time, as I can hardly tell them my concerns much less have them work on anything with her. I feel like they are just too busy to really give any patient the attention they need. Maybe I still need to consider another therapist in another nearby city. Nadia also has a speech therapy appointment at the end of the month. She was in speech, and actually physical therapy also, when she was younger, but I feel like she still needs some help with speech. She doesn’t talk much, although can, but sometimes she acts like she wants to say something but can’t think of the word. Other times she will make a noise or point for something she wants. We’ll see what they have to say.

I can’t think of what else is new… since we don’t leave the house much. We did go to my sister’s house for the 4th of July which was fun, lots of good food! Otherwise, same old same old here playing LEGOs!

Sunday

According to my phone, it’s Sunday. Feels like a Tuesday or Friday. Everyday feels similar lately. The weekends don’t stand out, being Eric works most of them, this one included.

The only reason I’m writing is because both girls are napping, at the same time, which happens about once a month lately, so I needed to take advantage. I’m convinced Nadia’s heart medication is what messes with her sleep, basically eliminating her daytime naps… We are weaning her off it, so the naps are becoming a bit more regular, but still far from anything I’d consider normal for a child her age.

I didn’t have a sitter this past week. Don’t even get me started. I know, it was a holiday, so I expected her to take some time off, but I thought I was at least going to have her Friday and then she texted me Thursday that they were staying out-of-town through the weekend. I feel like that’s the issue with someone coming to your home, or taking your kids to their home… The dependability just isn’t there, it just doesn’t compare to a center. And while yes, I am a stay-at-home mom, I have a ton of crap planned, mostly doctors appointments for the girls multiple times a week now, and some outings for me as well, and it’s hard to rearrange everything at the last-minute. I feel like I’m that person, who is always cancelling appointments and rescheduling. And August is even a bigger mess with a sitter, as the one I love isn’t available as much as I thought, although she will be back in town for the school year. It’s probably time to place another ad on care.com and start the process of finding a sitter all over again. Even the idea terrifies me.

Which brings me to opening my own daycare center… Still in the research phase. Looking more into Goddard currently, although I’m scared it’s a bit too upscale for this area. My research so far is pointing to our previous city being a better fit. Of course. Of course! The same things I hate about this city are still biting me in the butt! There are definitely enough people here on wait-lists wanting childcare… I’m just not yet convinced there are enough families with enough disposable income to spend well above average for such a service. Granted, they would getting more than just childcare, but it’s getting families to want that, and pay for that, and see the value in it, which might be the issue here.

No word from the sellers of the house we made an offer on… A little part of me thought they might come back to us by now, but nothing yet. I do know they are having an open house today though.

I should be napping… I’m exhausted. I got our little pool out for Nora again this morning. It wears her out and thus she takes a good nap, but it wears me out too! It’s a ton of work to get it out, blow it up, with the pump thing, find all the pool toys, fill it with water, get her in a swim diaper and suit, find a blanket for Nadia and I to sit on, carry each of them down the 10 steep stairs into our backyard, slather them both with sunscreen, then make 17 more trips up and down the stairs for everything else I forgot, then bring everything in an hour later, remove wet suits and wash, re-clothe them in dry clothing and real diapers, drain the pool, blah blah blah. You get the idea. It’s so much work! Why are kids so much work?? I mean, I think I’m a pretty well-adjusted adult with lots of resources. How do younger moms with no help and fewer resources handle this?? And then I was taking Nadia’s infant carrier car seat and rock-n-play into the basement for storage and thought, we have way too much baby stuff not to have another kid. OMG, but it’s so much work!

Do I try to do too much at once? While all the pool stuff was going on, I was also doing laundry and general cleanup of the house. Still doing laundry. I’m still in my swimsuit, as no time to take that off. Just grabbing lunch for myself now… I miss work, where I felt like I was able to focus, and actually finish tasks. I still believe Eric thinks staying with the girls is easy, and maybe in some ways it is easier than working outside the home. But then how come I never seem to actually accomplish anything? Like making dinner while watching the girls… It feels impossible! Maybe Eric should try watching the girls in his operating room while he’s performing surgery. Yes! He should have to get them snacks, turn on the next “Daniel Tiger” episode, change their diapers, etc. And no help from the OR nurses or scrub techs either! That is how this feels to me. Like I’m doing several jobs as once. It’s so draining, and frustrating.